Learning how to Muggle
by Meandrina
Summary: Hermione has a strange conversation with Theo Nott which may or may not provide some insight into the mind of a certain blond. Two-shot. Dramione. Post-war fic. Please R&R! :)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Weird little idea, but I couldn't resist. This is set after the war. Dramione.**

**Hope you like it. :)**

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"Okay. What in the Merlin's name is a Googull?"

Draco Malfoy's unimpressed voice made Hermione look up from her Muggle Studies essay.

At any other time, she would have laughed at his straight-faced expression, but she had been entertaining similar questions from him since the past one hour, so she just looked heavenward and prayed to be rewarded with an ounce of patience.

"It's a search engine." She explained shortly.

His reply was an arrogant "Oh."

Silence.

This silence was the reason why she was positive that he had the wrong idea about the concept but she couldn't bring herself to correct the fool.

"So, this engine." He spoke, "It's a muggle train that goes around looking for missing people, right?"

She could have wept.

"No, Malfoy. It's one of the most popular websites on the internet that allows you to search for information or other sites of information based on what you type. We covered websites, didn't we?"

She ignored his blank look and continued.

"It also specializes in other internet based services like email, chats, videos, social networking, news and blogs. Basically, it's this multinational company that provides software, cloud storage, advertising platform and such. It's very successful."

Malfoy sneered.

"I'm not a stinkin' muggle. The only reason you are tutoring me is because _you're _one. If you can't help me with what should obviously be a piece of cake for you, we have a problem."

She closed her eyes for what seemed like the fiftieth time.

"That's what I've been trying to do all this time. But I can't help if you aren't even paying attention! Internet was covered _weeks _ago. And you're still stuck on Google!"

"What the hell is Googull?!"

"I just told you!"

"Well, it was rubbish!"

"It's the best I could do!"

"Then you're not as smart as they think you are, are you?"

Hermione mentally counted to ten.

"Google-" she gritted out slowly, "is a website. If you want some information and don't know where to look for it, you type in the keywords and _google_ will provide with a long list of links to other websites. These websites may contain the information you're looking for. In background though, Google is a large provider for many other services on the internet. Email or electronic mail. Books. News. Videos…they're a collection of moving images, you know? And social networking, so you can stay connected with the people you know. Do you understand?"

He looked at her haughtily from beneath his pale eyelashes.

"See now that wasn't so hard, was it?"

She wanted to reach over the table and strangle him. He probably guessed as much, and smirked.

She furiously continued with her own essay, digging the quill onto the parchment.

"Bloody hell, no wonder your kind is so miserable. Inventing all sorts of crap tech—techo…_technology _and complicating everything. Didn't anyone tell you that simplicity is elegance?"

She had been smiling as he struggled with the word, completely taking the bite out of what he was saying.

"They don't have the luxury of waving a wand around and making things happen on a whim. Too bad they only have their brains to rely upon."

He scoffed, then looked down to his unfinished essay and began writing. She prayed to God that whatever he was writing was factually correct because, jeez the guy was turning out to be a bigger pain in the arse than she could've anticipated. He could win the Order of Merlin in potions someday but he had the thickest brains in the whole world when it came down to Muggle studies.

It was an unsolved mystery as to _why _he had opted for this particular subject when it wasn't even required for his education. He did not need any grace points, he had been given no such direction by the Ministry during his trial and nor was he short of N.E.W.T subjects..he was taking more than the compulsory five. It was even more mystifying when it was clear that he was obviously struggling with it.

Deep down, she had to admire his determination. Even when he was scoffing at the Shakespearean dialogue or scratching his head at the way a gas stove worked, she could appreciate the underlying curiosity and a reluctant fascination. This was the reason why when Professor Bobbins had requested to tutor their new student, she had reluctantly agreed.

"Are you nearly done?" she asked.

"This will take all weekend." He muttered without looking up from his book.

She decided to go ahead with what had been eating at her for all this time.

"Malfoy, why did you take Muggle studies?"

She'd probably imagined it, but she saw his shoulders stiffening.

"That's none of your fucking business."

Her fingers automatically inched towards her wand.

"I think it is. I want to know why I'm wasting my time tutoring someone as obviously hopeless as you." She goaded.

He did not rise to it. He gave an exaggerated sigh, marked the page that he had been reading and gathered his things.

"Same time, tomorrow. Don't be late." He snarled.

She stared at his retreating back with a mixture of anger and awe. Five months had passed since the second Wizarding war and Draco Malfoy had yet to speak a polite word to her. She had spotted him giving Harry a nod here and there, and she could've sworn she had heard him mutter 'Excuse me' as he had been making his way around Neville yesterday. But he couldn't cough up a single word of respect for his tutor.

"Ungrateful prick."

There was a deep chuckle behind her.

She jumped at the voice, and turned to face him.

It was Theodore Nott.

She almost groaned. _Too many snakes for today._

"What are you doing here?"

He pushed off the shelf that he had been leaning against and came to stand in front of her.

"For someone so smart, you can be unbelievably dense, Granger."

She'd had her daily dose of cryptic Slytherins for one day, thank you very much.

"What are you talking about?"

"Seeing as you're so obviously distressed because of my friend's behaviour, I can't help but provide some insight into the matter."

She crossed her arms in resignation. "Well, go ahead."

"It will cost you."

Of course.

"What do you want?"

He smirked.

"I want your word that you'll help Draco no matter what, and genuinely make an effort with him."

She frowned.

"Help him…with Muggle Studies?"

"That too, but you need to help him with what I'm about to tell you. You have to be fair. You have to try."

This was just bizarre, and she was tired, so she said, "Alright."

He nodded.

"Didn't you realise that Draco's taking up Muggle Studies coincided with your infamous declaration that you are going to leave the magical community for a few years and live life as a muggle?"

"I made no such declaration! I only decided it with my friends. Word just got out."

Nott was staring at her with pity.

"What?"

"You're supposed to be smart. Do the math. He also specifically requested the professor for you to tutor him."

Hermione stared at him.

She thought back to the day when Malfoy had entered the classroom, looking threatening and out of place and surprising the hell out of everyone, including her. She recalled the way he had spotted her among the crowd and a certain tranquillity had settled over his features. That time she had mistaken it for contempt. Several points were missing…and it was merely a theory. Surely Nott was lying.

But still…

"Does he really-?" She looked up at him for confirmation.

But he was gone.

He had promised insight, and he'd fulfilled his end of the bargain. It was just too bad as now she was left more confused than she had been before.

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**Please tell me what you think!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I would like to begin by saying: a HUGE thank you to all the great reviewers!****I confess I had no intention of continuing this, but one tends to waver when faced with such amazing feedback. :)**

**So, here's the last bit.**

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Hermione paced outside the small classroom where the practical exam for Muggle Studies was currently underway. It was not her own performance that she was fretting over; her test had gone stellar even by her standards. She was currently wondering how Draco Malfoy was faring in front of the beady-eyed examiner who she was fifty percent sure was a Muggle.

Yes, she had taken great pains to tutor the blonde bane of her existence but in retrospect, every minute had been worth it. It was, after all, a necessary drill if he hoped to pass the N.E.W.T.s. She knew his written exam had gone fairly well, if the cocky expression on his face as he had walked out of the Examination hall had been any indication. But Muggle Studies, like any other subject, was a potential minefield for someone as clueless as he had been..then.

But now…now that she was aware, now that she knew, it had transformed into a challenge of sorts. The true test of intelligence was if one could explain and convey their knowledge to an amateur, and she believed that she had done well in that department too.

It had been a bumpy ride, until one night when it had all changed.

* * *

_Three months ago…_

"I don't understand why muggles need gymnasiums. One could easily go and exercise in a park." He frowned as he suddenly looked up from his reading.

She blinked, and then felt the familiar heat creep up her neck.

It had become increasingly difficult to pull her eyes away from his face each day.

As his quicksilver eyes moved swiftly across the lines in the textbook, his face looked like it had been carved out of some rare kind of marble. His skin was free of any blemishes, freckles or spots. Sometimes his eyes flashed with something unknown when he'd stare far into the distance. Had it not been for that five o'clock shadow, he might have looked like he was some ethereal being sent down to tempt mortal girls.

She felt really tempted.

She looked down to gain some semblance of sanity, only to get distracted by his hands.

"Granger!", he barked.

She blinked, then decided to finally reply with a "Shhh! Library!"

He let his head fall back as he scrutinized her face, waiting for her to answer him.

She licked her lips.

"Gyms can keep them motivated towards their goals. The surroundings can change the outlook. While in a gym, they can consistently work on their fitness without getting strayed. They're not strictly necessary, it just works better for them."

He seemed to mull over this.

"Fucking morons."

She kicked him in the shin under the table and was rewarded with a very satisfying grunt of pain.

She knew his outlook on Muggles had morphed into grudging admiration as he slowly learnt about their history and culture, their undying knack of experimenting, and their uphill battle for excellence. So when he stumbled across any 'questionable' peculiarity he would jump at the chance to degrade them, but only halfheartedly so.

She was already done with her own essay, so she levitated a book on Medieval Herbology from a nearby shelf.

"Won't you miss it?" he almost blurted.

She looked at him curiously. He suddenly looked like he'd rather be anywhere else.

"Miss what?"

"Nothing." He said quickly. Was that blush forming on his cheeks?

"What?"

He avoided her eyes as he turned a page.

"Won't you miss doing this kind of simple magic while you're out there in the muggle world?" his tone was carefully nonchalant.

Finally. Finally he had decided to broach the subject that had always seemed to hang over them like a bad smell just waiting to be acknowledged. She had dropped hints, asked the same question over and over again but he always sat stiff and silent. She still did _not _know why he was taking Muggle Studies. She just knew what had inspired the decision.

She resisted the urge to grin.

"Oh, I will…for a week or two."

He was silent.

One.

Two.

Three.

"What about Potter? Weasel? Your friends_?" _he enquired again.

"They'll live. I'm not going underground. I'm going to stay in touch with all of them. Ginny and I are even thinking of renting a flat."

"Oh."

He ran a hand through the hair at the back of his head but did not say anything else.

She stretched and yawned. She glanced at the clock.

"Merlin! Would you look at the time? It's past eleven!" She proceeded to gather her stuff in her book bag and stood up.

"Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Malfoy." She tried her best not to sound like she was looking forward to it.

As she walked down the dim lit aisles inside the library, she felt sort of giddy…glad that the subject was finally out in the open and yet, completely deflated. She still had not received any answers. By now she was getting increasingly convinced that Nott had been lying. That's what Slytherins do. She had held her end of the bargain. She'd worked her ass off with him, tutored him, tested him, lectured him, went as far as to letting him insult her muggle ways like he was so fond of doing. And there was no way in hell that Malfoy would-

There was a loud screech followed by rapid sounds of footsteps. She had barely turned before she was hauled by the arm and pulled into a corner between the shelves.

Draco Malfoy stood in front of her looking breathless, disoriented and just a bit mad.

She looked into his grey eyes, willing him to say something.

"You can rent a flat here. In the Magical world."

She stared at him agape.

"Yes, Malfoy, I know I can."

"You can stay here. You _belong_ here."

She sighed.

"I don't know what you're on about. I'm just going to live in Muggle London for a while. Honestly, it's all decided and it's not like I'm giving up on magic. I'm just taking a break."

"Why the hell would you need a break? You're the Brightest witch of our Age!"

Why couldn't he just get to the point already?

"I'm also a war hero, Malfoy! If I want to turn muggle for some time, it's none of your business!"

"But why_?_! Why would you want to turn muggle when you're a goddamn witch!"

"What does that have to do with anything? I'm a _person, _Malfoy. Magic does not define me. Not anymore."

"But what is wrong with staying among wizards? You said it, you're a war heroine. You'll be treated like a queen!"

She shook her head in disgust.

"Honestly, I don't see why you're so bothered. Tell me one thing though."

"What?" He gritted out.

She looked him straight in the eye.

"Why did you take Muggle Studies?"

He stared at her hopelessly, deflated, arms hanging lifelessly by his sides.

"Why do you think, Granger?" Her breath caught.

He ran both his hands through his hair, making it look deliciously mussed.

"Why do you think I would endure this day after day, learn about all this crazy stuff that I never would've thought in a million years I would learn. It's daft and demented and so brilliant that it makes my brain _ache_, but really…why should I fill my head with this knowledge that I just-don't-need?"

He had taken three steps closer as he said the last words, coming to stand directly in front of her, caging her in. But strangely enough, she did not feel confined.

"I'm no muggle, but I know if I had been one, I would kill for some magic. Why are you throwing it away?"

"I'm not-", she protested.

"You are. I know. You will grow to embrace the non-magic way of living. Now that you have proved that you're in no way lesser than any pureblood. You have quenched your thirst of magic and gone out and won a war in the process. But what about me?" His voice was pained. "How am I supposed to make a move when you're a whole world away?"

She wanted him to continue but ironically her next word were-

"My God, Malfoy.._shut up._" Her voice was just above a whisper.

He plowed through.

"I couldn't pull off those jeans if my life depended on it and I sure as hell don't know how to go places without Apparating there first, so how am I going to find you when you're so far away?"

Dear lord, and Nott had called _her_ dense.

She bit her lip thoughtfully and finally decided to answer him.

"You could make your move now." Her voice was blunt.

It took him a few seconds to catch up, before that familiar smirk spread over his features and by God, did she love it.

She wanted to feel it. In the flesh. On her mouth.

He ran his thumb over her lips in slow, languid strokes, teasing her, testing her. She responded by licking her lips once more, before she suddenly realized what she was doing. She looked up into his eyes to find them still fixated on her mouth.

When he pulled her by the waist, an involuntary gasp escaped her lips and he swooped down to capture them in a kiss. He planted his tongue deep inside her mouth, exploring it, then withdrew slightly to run his tongue over lips before plunging in again. She responded with the same fervor and he groaned appreciatively.

She ran her fingers through the soft hair at the back of his head, while he explored the contours of her body. She felt dizzy, drunk but had never felt more alive in her life. Her body thrummed with electricity, her nerve endings felt frayed with pleasure. She could survive on this electricity for life.

They were at it for minutes, hours probably, and when Hermione finally surfaced for some air, his cocky grin was back.

"Still want to go muggle?" He panted.

"You bet."

* * *

_Present day…_

Draco walked out of the classroom looking like he was a force to be reckoned with. His face was red and he was muttering obscenities.

Hermione's heart sank.

"How'd it go?"

He ignored her and continued to walk forward. She had to run to catch up with him. He came to a halt in front of Greenhouse number five.

"Filthy little muggle. I wanted to wring his meaty little neck!"

"What happened?"

"So he pulls out this flat mirror and hands it to me. I stare and stare and he expects me to perform something with it without telling me what the fuck I'm supposed to do. I ask him what to do. He says 'Make a call'. The fuck does _that _mean?! He asks me if I know what a sell phone is. Obviously I know what a telephone is so I tell him. But he isn't satisfied. He asks me what the seven wonders of the world are..I tell him. He still doesn't look pleased. He asks me how the car gears work. You _know _I can never get them right. He finally tells me that I can never survive in the muggle world because I lack the 'muggle keenness and curiosity' and I'll remain 'essentially handicapped'. But he can't flunk me because I know my basics."

She flung her arms around him in delight. He finally looked down at her face, eyes sparkling with amusement.

"Oh, Draco I'm so happy!"

He cupped her face in both hands and kissed her.

As they walked hand-in-hand around the lake, she asked him:

"So…still want to go muggle?"

He smirked.

"You bet."

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**So, that's it folks! I'm really sorry if the length and content isn't what you expected but my creativity hits in spurts and I can never hold on to it. Still, I hope you liked it. :))**


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